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Shawn: I’d describe this setting as a blue movie take on a Vincent Price/Edgar Allan Poe epic from the early 70s called The Mounting of Morella or The Bitchfinder General.
His Faustian Van Dyke and bicep bat tattoo are icing on the cake. If it’s possible to fuse Neo-Goth with Country Primitive, this guy has pulled it off.
High props for the velvety deep green draperies and tablecloth. Both items would seem pretentious and “bordello” were it not for the glossy wood chairs and matching chandelier — two items that could be set interiors on Twin Peaks.
I think the candelabra may be the linchpin of the whole affair. Very Interview With The Vampire. No one really needs one of them, yet he’d lose some of his mystique without it.
The bonus is the treeny Home Sweet Home-style wall mount in the background that adds a cozy air to the whole affair.
Sure, he’s probably going to exsanguinate you or perform some sort of diabolical sex rite upon you while you lay dazed and powerless, but he’ll serve you a nice homemade apple crisp first.
We’ve all had worse.
David K. publishes Nightcharm, the only gay porn site ever to be featured on Oprah and regularly compared to Martha Stewart Living.
John Calendo is the Executive Editor of Nightcharm, and a life-long Pop Critic @ Large. His work has appeared in Playboy, Blueboy and boy oh boy everything in between.
Shawn hails from New York and is a member of its young underclass, a little bit Ann Darrow, a little bit Travis Bickle.
Heather Corinna is the undisputed diva of online erotica for chicks. She publishes Scarleteen.com and is a sex guru to thousands of teenagers.
Richard writes the infamous queer blog Sturtle.com . His turn-ons include wainscoting, ZZ Top, and sharp-dressed men. Turn-offs: sectionals, pleated trousers, and pina coladas.
Steve is a lost sort of man who zones out, easily, into the foreheads of strangers. He keeps a blog of his drawings here.
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nice ass. I’d eat it. horrid chair. I would not eat it in that chair.
What can I say? I just like ass tan lines. And I like round asses that appear to have some meat to ‘em–and he’s got just that.
But I do not like that chair.
Nothing says “this date is going well” like a man who prepares a gourmet meal (and with matching chairs including one off to the side under the needlepoint sampler and another by the candlabra, this is definitely the dining room) and then sweeps all the dishes off the table, turns around and offers himself up for dessert! Beats the hell out of a bundt cake, and works off some of those pesky calories as well. I wonder if he was wearing a caftan during the meal and then just shucked it off - surprise!
The tilt of the ass confirms he’s no stranger to this goth variation of the chair scene in “Flashdance”. Let the waterworks begin!
Oh, and bag those chairs. The upholstery pattern gives me the vapors….
Who lives in a place like this? It is very 1970’s “victorian”. This looks like a not-so-well done Victorian house in Louisville, KY.
Let’s give him the benefit of the doubt and suggest that maybe the next B&B he checks into is one that has updated the decor sometime in the last 30 years.
Or maybe he has a friend that works in an historical home? The friend snuck him in for a little photo and play session?
We can only hope that those chairs have been Scotch-Guarded before heaven only knows what leaks from who knows where. But then considering that the window probably faces the street, he seems to live dangerously so stains be damned.
I think this is my chiropractor. Really..
I would still tap it. Just not at his place.
wELL, aspshortjock, dude, I feel your pain when it comes to tan lines, and more particularly, to eating ass (I too am an ass muncher and not much pickyness plays into whom I’l chomp on.), but come on man, the chair in question is fierce….hell, where’s your sense of design and decorating…ok, I give you one, but that is what upholsterers (sic) are for, and high-end silk fabric (Brunswick and Fils maybe
).
Sounds like we have a lot in common though so I won’t rag you on the classic chair design too much.
Later. C.G.