Steve: This is the story of a simple man, surrounded by rich fabrics, beautiful men, and incredible bargains on showroom-quality home furnishings. Let the man be known as “Ted.” A.K.A. “Snuggles.” Ted’s secret underwear are about to be unleashed on an unprepared world.
Nothing can make you ready to receive what you’re about to encounter.
File Under:Living Room Wreckage
16 Responses to 'Ted — Racing Stripe and Satin Oppulence'
Leave a Reply
David K. publishes Nightcharm, the only gay porn site ever to be featured on Oprah and regularly compared to Martha Stewart Living.
John Calendo is the Executive Editor of Nightcharm, and a life-long Pop Critic @ Large. His work has appeared in Playboy, Blueboy and boy oh boy everything in between.
Shawn hails from New York and is a member of its young underclass, a little bit Ann Darrow, a little bit Travis Bickle.
Heather Corinna is the undisputed diva of online erotica for chicks. She publishes Scarleteen.com and is a sex guru to thousands of teenagers.
Richard writes the infamous queer blog Sturtle.com . His turn-ons include wainscoting, ZZ Top, and sharp-dressed men. Turn-offs: sectionals, pleated trousers, and pina coladas.
Steve is a lost sort of man who zones out, easily, into the foreheads of strangers. He keeps a blog of his drawings here.
- Bathroom Abominations
- Bedroom Terrors
- Beyond Horrifying
- Calvacade of Calamities
- Closet Catastrophes
- Curb Upheaval
- Dens From Hell
- Dining Room Don'ts
- Floral Attack
- For the hell of it
- Fucked Up Foyers
- Haunted Hallways
- Kitchen Kitsch
- Living Room Wreckage
- Loopy Lighting
- Must Haves
- Something Different
- Suffocating Sofas
- Violations of Space
- May 2008
- April 2008
- March 2008
- February 2008
- January 2008
- December 2007
- November 2007
- October 2007
- September 2007
- August 2007
- July 2007
- June 2007
- May 2007
- April 2007
- March 2007
- February 2007
- Jake Cruise
- MALEFLIX
- Military Classified
- Men at Play
- Sean Cody
- Bi Curious
- Three Pillows
- Boy's First Time
- Nightcharm: Naked Men & Gay Porn Fun
- Dainty Bastard
- G Day
- Gay Sex Magic eCards
- Gideonse Bible
- He Said He Did
- It’s Not You, It’s Me
- Lord Arthur
- Mean Dirty Pirate
- My Cat Threw Up on my Ferragamos
- Put ‘em All on an Island
- Queer Bites
- STARFUCKER
- Wayne’s Nude Musicians
- Yuppie Punk
© 2008 Nightcharm Inc. All rights reserved. No portion of this site may be reproduced without the writen permission of the owner.
Nothing says “whore house” like gold frames…..everywhere! But I must say, the mirror is most interesting!! I can tell this guy love the finer things in life antiques and men hotter than he is. I personally have never had my picture taken while I had a mouth full of marshmallows. I’ll put that on my list of things to do.
I must say, I was expecting the stripe on that jockstrap to be gold. Thank goodness it was red.
Tex, any takers on this one?
I wonder what sort of antics are showing up in the mirror; that is, IF that’s a mirror and not a portal to Satan’s Playroom. The room looks very Grandma’s Cozy Old-Lady Filing Cabinet from 1968. It smells of White Shoulders and face powder, and there’s a big bowl of ribbon candy out of frame that’s turned into a great sticky dust-furred lump.
Mister, you’ve got a lot of nerve doing your interwebs naughty business in Grandma’s Cozy Old-Lady Filing Cabinet. Just wait til she gets back from the after-church brunch at Bob Evans; there will be hell to pay I assure you.
Not that it really matters, but I sense that he is not in his own home. I think he’s a guest enjoying his host’s opulence.
I’m with you on the gold frame assessment, musclebound.
If the racing stripe was salmon instead of Day-Glo orangy-red, it would complement the pattern of the pillow behind his head and create a viable eyeline. As it stands, it’s just “I have a crotch,” which is not enough of an artistic statement to validate the rest of his ensemble.
Then again, nothing says “daddy” like 1950’s horned-rimmed glasses. So kudos for literalism.
I believe Jeff is right. He’s not at his own home. This is one of those very suburban S/M private play parties, and those are a couple of other guests reflected in the mirror. Somewhere out of sight is a fully stocked dungeon that is no doubt a strange cocktail of scents: Cisco, poppers, sweat, Armerall (or some other brand of leather cleaner, because you know the host wanted everything just so), and potpourri.
In the room pictured, the host asks that no bare bottoms sit on the furniture, but he has a stack of thirsty towels freshly laundered should you need to shower up before leaving.
That’s a mirror? I thought it was a framed blow-up of a cherished memory. (Snuggles Wins Third Runner-Up in the 2001 Mr. Leather Competition, Boise Chapter.)
That said, I concur with rear_window’s astute analysis completely, right down to the thirsty towels. De rigeur at such an event, of course.
The cluster-fuck of frou-frou pillows struggling for dominance of a sofa at an S&M gathering is unexpected, to say the least. There are several grabbers but the fuschia damask alongside the peanut butter-and-jelly faux-toile are my personal favorites.
Off-topic Sidebar: Something about Ted screams Drag Queen to me. Church Lady-style Drag Queen. Call it a hunch…
yeah Tex….
why’s he still dressed? the people in the mirror clearly are ready to party.
Jimbo beautifully states what I was thinking. It’s a scene of total cognitive dissonance.
perhaps there’s a fuck room with latex rubber floors and a sling somewhere else on the property and this is the room for “classy company.”
One does not wear cotton with leathers, Mr. Tilson. Es geht nicht. I don’t care how long you’ve been teaching high school students American history, it’s simply not done. And yes, it is entirely unethical to offer ‘after-hours extra credit’ points to members of the varsity swim team.
What’s that, Mr. Tilson? Well, I don’t know. I have no idea how many boys you’ll have to fuck this time to win Teacher of the Year. You go ahead and cry about it if you want, you big baby. Crying isn’t what got Miss Tuchingoh the award last year, was it?
Here’s my question. Why do all these amateur Leather Daddies almost always wear prominently displayed wedding bands? Are they saying, “I’m really straight; this is just what I do while the ball and chain is on a weekend bus trip to the outlet mall.” Is it some kind of lure to trap gay guys who want to be dominated by straight, married Masters?
Or does he live in a state that has sanctioned same-sex civil unions and the figures in the mirror are guests at his and Steve’s anniversary party.
what is the deal with the ring?
MMmmm….maybe if his other “guests” are hot. Not only is he not in his native habitat, but I think he borrowed the jock strap as well.
You just know SOMEONE is going to spoil the evening with skid marks.
ok, completely creepy I know… but he TOTALLY reminds me of Ed Wynn! The guy who loved to laugh in Mary Poppins! =P
Oh dear. Why is this man wearing a leather school crossing-guard sash over a tee-shirt? Sweetie, if you don’t have the chest to wear it properly (sans tee-shirt), then just don’t wear it at all!
Ted’s boyfriend/civil unionee has been desperately wanting to shake things up for years. Ted has finally agreed. The postman shorts, the black cotton t-shirt and the glasses all say “I’m doing this for you, dear, but I’m not really into it.”
Tex is right: the jock is borrowed (from the boyfriend) or it was bought especially for this occasion. It will never be worn again.
Sidenote: ever notice that leather guys are often into frilly home furnishings? I went home with a guy, very leather, very daddyish, but man his house was nothing but cushions, gold frames, and plush couches. Didn’t kill the mood, but still… weird.
otto! totally
a friend of mine says leather is just another form of drag.
me? I don’t care. But I do only bring out the leather at Halloween….
There are shades of pink that a man can play with but then there are other shades that belong in Marie Antoinette’s bedroom.
I honestly thought that the Nazi’s banned degenerate art about 70 years ago. How did this survive?