Steve: Mr. Lemons has undertaken the task of integrating the old with the new to splendid, and startling effect. Behind him, an array of semi-priceless items under consideration for display in his soon-to-be modernized living room, and to his right, the box from which his new 28.8 k modem emerged. In the dishwasher-safe Tupperware® container below his roost you’ll find pressed, lightly moist towelettes for practical reasons.
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My eyes are bleeding!!! Mommy, make it go away. I am usually the last to post so I fear no one else has survived this visual attack…can’t hold on much longer… Judging from the box beside his chair, it looks like our pal Musclebound got an internet connection and sent us a self-portrait. I just threw up in my mouth. Gotta go.
Thrilling to see the Infant of Prague in this startling tableau. I assume that’s a prayer book on the edge of the ghastly coffee table.
This picture appears to have been taken the night before a home jumble sale to benefit the Knights of Columbus.
Okay Gramps, granted you have a huge cock and big balls (with way too much hair by the way) but did you have to have this pic taken in front of your antique booth?
Buddy X is this your dad?
Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhhh!
Infant of Prague, indeed!
The hair! Oh, Lord-God-King-BuFu!
It’s so……THICK it almost looks like it was Photoshop’d.
I bet he does a Santa gig every year down at McCrory’s.
“Sit on my lap, little boy and tell me what you REALLY want for Christmas!”
It appears that “Lil’ Gramps” is paying homage to the “Queen-Victoria-as-portrayed-by-a-Geppetto-Doll” creche, so nonchalantly placed in full view in the living room floor.
*singing* Holy, holy, hoooolllyyy, Lord God Almiiiiightyyyyy!
No doubt those “lightly moist towelettes for practical reasons” under his chair are to remove the “kiss marks” he undoubtedly left on that off-white satin chair he sat on without and protection from his protruding sphincter.
Oh, come on! The Infant of Prague shouldn’t have to look at THAT! (Come to think of it, neither should I!)
It’s as if your great-grandfather contracted elephantitis and decided to tell you all about it at at a Baptist flea market! I feel like I should wash my eyes out with soap!
I’ll never be able to think of San Francisco in the same way again. Yikes.
G-Pa, I’d take you far away from all this and get you into some natural fibers.
But we both know you’d sneak off and we both know you’d score some of your smack.
At first it would be just a harmless Vaseline glass tray.
Then you’d find some ruby hobnail vases.
By the time I wrestled the epernes from your dusty mitts, my rectum would be wrecked.
Instead, I’ll turn up the volume on ‘Murder She Wrote’ and slowly back out of the room.
If Gramps paid us – in advance, please – 200 Euros cash we would be thrilled to ‘relieve’ his large ‘problem’!
Is the sizemeat photoshopped?
at last we know why old saint nick was so jolly.
Early 80s horror films. That’s what I keep thinking of. Those slasher movies with holiday themes, like Black Christmas, My Bloody Valentine, or Happy Birthday to Me. Those films loved to mix the wholesome with the horrific. Charming elderly couples would turn out to be cannibals, cute animals and children’s toys were possessed by demons, and gruesome things were always popping out at you with a shriek of violins. That’s not a penis, it’s a monster. RUN!!!
Now THAT! My friends!
is a DONG!
BONE ME GRANDPA!
OK…The collection of items in this background is hilarious or it wouldn’t have made the site. What I would like to discuss, despite the “How To Post AT Lurid Digs” statement, is the blindingly oxymoronic nature of the gentleman. At first, there is the undeniable desire to go to KFC as a more likely candidate for The Colonel’s replacement is not easily to be found. Then, as you pan down, you are confronted by something that looks absolutely “finger lickin’ good. Bringing visions of if the wolfman did porn. Thereby forcing one to cover the face and background of the photo and wonder to myself just how much I would be willing to endure to get at the lurking wolfman cock…Think of it this way…if you were confronted with that lovely piece in a glory hole how would you react to it? Furthermore, how would you react upon seeing the person it is attached to? I have a feeling that several, myself included, would be found slinking from his cluttered time-machine of a home early in the morning….
Tex, is the reason you haven’t responded that you are “shopping” at this antique store?
Mrs Campbell is right on the money: his junk is most certainly ’shopped. A small sin, all things considered, when compared with the evils he has chosen to surround himself with.
So wrong in so many ways. I know i’m suppose to focus on the interior, but that crotch hair! that facial hair! Nothing agaist the guy..all the power to him, GO GRAMPA! He scares me more than the doll.
three cheers for viagra!
Sorry…not a thing in this antique shop I need or want. I don’t care HOW massive his cock is. There’s not enough Viagra in the world to get me to take this on.
This one is wrong on EVERY level.
Scuse me, I have to go outside to vomit now.
the man can’t work a razor, what makes you think he has the ability to photoshop his cock. Credit where credit’s due, nice cock… Why are they always wasted on the wrong people though…evidence God has a sense of humour.
Grampa Thatch works through the pain of losing his wife of 50 years by observing the little-known sixth stage of grief: getting ur freak on.
Where I come from one hands over a small coin and in return one is given three balls to shy at the breakables. Break three and you can take a smally fluffy animal of your own choosing. Wrapped in a moist towelette of course.
Infant of Prague, pray for us… but not for HIM!
It just goes to show really.. hold on to anything long enough and it attracts sentimental value. Hold on it for a really long time and you’ll be stacking coffee tables in your lounge and shopping for almost matching items so that the necessary gravitas can be underlined with height and pseudo-symmetry.
I must say I’m surprised that no one has commented on the masterful photography here. Gramps providing a strong vertical.. uh.. element, with a subtle dutch tilt enlivening the merry cavalvade of flea market memories, and cunningly cropping the apex of that display which draws the eye so certainly. I find myself craning to glimpse the top of that shrine like it’s the last page of a detective novel. This of course brings me eye-to-eye (as it were) with Gramp’s jaunty pride, which directs me off to the infant of Prague, and so the merry-go-round begins again. This must be what a pinball feels like.
SOOOOO WRONG! On so many levels.
But I’ll say this: had Gramps groomed his bush, I probably would not have noticed half of the junk that cluttering his photograph. Because while he’s a pack rat and that doll to his left is very creepy, we all have to admit that he’s packing quite a fuckstick.
*that’s*
…I meant to say, “that’s cluttering his photograph…”
if you look closely you’ll see that the infant of prague has lifted his other tiny fingers to show his full palm…as if to stay, “please stop sir.”
And also to say, “stop filling my little green bottle with lube and the essence of small boys.”
It’s absolutely impossible for me to critique this room. That cock has special powers that eclipse every single item in that space, sans the ballhair. Holy Crap! It has a tractor beam steadied on my eye sockets! Send help.
Even more disturbing than the flea market stall he’s sitting in front of is the fact that his massive, undeforested meat seems to be lurching towards Baby Jesus.
someone send me some medication. it just occurred to me that the infant of prague might not be a statue, but a blowup doll.
i may never close my eyes again.
Thursday night is party night at the Sunshine Home.
Steve Lemons
Nice touch.
I missed it the first time.
Oh dear God. The cock looks like it has a life of its own. Like it just burst out of his body like that thing in ‘Alien’. Like it’s whistling and jeering at the camera. Also, the bruising on the inner thighs is scaring me. I may never sleep again.
Hey-Zeus Chris-most! That is the biggest dong I ever did seeeeee!! I’ll forgive that his inner grandma decorated the house and take a swing on that cock. I bet he is more appreciative after than anyone.
Wow.
Wow Wow Wow … He captures ALL that is Baghdad by the Bay.
I don’t think it’s bruising. More likely it’s just mild rash or chafing, perhaps from wearing pants with tight-fitting legs.
Or perhaps he wears………..CORDUROY…..all year long!
i wish i had a dick that big,jusy and hairy
your sexy
Dear God, thank you for keeping that sweatshirt on!!!! I think I have the candy dish that matches the pink, Depression glass in the background. Clearly a vase alter to the Infant of Prague. I’m not sure that box next to him is an internet connection—I think it’s a box of latex gloves that work nicely with those moist toilettes under his chair. Cleanliness is next to Godliness
I hope he’s asked Santa for a Flowbee (vacuum cleaner/hair cutting device) to do some man grooming! High speed and shortest blade, please!!!!!!! Why do I want a piece of stale Wrigley’s chewing gum or some fruit cake when I look at this picture?!?!? Never mind, I think I’ll just have a high ball.
oh Mr i very look you nude. Besar sekali kontholmu ingin ngemut peny you disini tak ada kontho yang sebesar itu.
for dhany indonesian jawa. Im benar ingin ngenyot and memasukkan lubang buayaku. Benar-benar membikin puyeng kepala saya. Bolehkah saya ingin kenalan dengan anda.
Dude is cock is awesome would ride it all night long. I would eat his dirty hole and n his toilet slave
I’ve seen that face somewhere… now I remember – Adolf Hitler’s father.
OMG INFANT OF PRAGUE!
“Here’s my enormous horse-cock. We can pray some novenas after I fuck you. Oh, and Jesus will be watching in a frilly dress.”
Uh, guys…..
The Infant is there for several very helpful and practical reasons.
He’s there to remind us that we are all loved by God.
He’s there to remind us that all things are spiritual, including sex.
And He’s there cuz that’s where Gramps hides the poppers and cum rag….
…under His skirt. Next to the Viagra and his drug-store bifocals,
First Gramps just goes to show, in a big way, that not every white haired dude has pubes to match. Imagine just how popular he was as a young man.
I love the warning about NOT picking on the people…… so, following the pack……
Look at the guy’s bush….That’s not hair….. it’s either mold, Photoshopped to hide the gray….BUT look closer……it’s awfully pink under that black skuzz……
….Photoshopped to hide a lethal case of Jock itch? Or….
He used that spray, fuzzy stuff guys use on their (other) heads for bald spots……
…and That created the rash. Wait…. That’s not his dick….
The dick is photoshopped and the skuzz is their to hide the bad editing job. Or…..
…he’s really only 27 but had been tweaking/awake/masturbating for 3 weeks and his penis is dead inside and about to detach.
My bubbie threw these tchochkes out before she left Europe in 1922. How on earth did they survive?
Like my old cookery teacher used to say, there’s a big difference between something that is filling, and fillings that are nutritious.
oh.
HOLY HOLY HOLY SHIT !!! Now my own dad turns to be a total creep , so
I MUST give up my gay life and turn to be a total straight, SHIT !!!
I have actually known a couple of gentlemen with “museum” homes like this. It’s always interesting to see what they have on display before and after (and occasionally during, if we’re really taking our time).
But the main reason I’m posting is to offer you gents a treasure hunt of sorts. Assuming the gent in the photo is who I think it is, he also appears in a couple of adult films. Have fun finding them!
Okay, this entry is old as hell and moot at this point, but I’ll post anyway.
Obviously photoshopped. Not by this guy (as if grandpa here would be able to competently operate a cell phone, let alone actually open and manipulate a j-peg with some old-assed copy of Photoshop 4.0).
No–this image was faked by someone with a thing for “mature” men. And not very well, either. The lighting on the dick appears to fit that in the photo, so I’ll assume it was rescaled from its original size to that of a Pringles can.
The digital manipulations are partially given away by the blurry edges, and the poor attempt made at concealing the transitions within the mess of pubic hair.
The real dead giveaway, though, are those balls. They look nothing like actual testicles. Instead, they look like some idealized set of “balls” one would find in a Sharpie drawing of a cock and balls in a public restroom stall. Nobody–NOBODY–has perfectly spherical testicles that nestle at the base of their cock like a pair of goddamned pink tennis balls. No–that’s an abstraction of testicles created by someone who has never paid the smallest attention to the actual details of human anatomy.
Plus, if those were this fellow’s actual balls, at his age they’d be dangling well below the edge of the seat of that chair.
hey sexy = love it…i love hair….
i love it call me for a fun time.
16162955408
Hmm. The carpet doesn’t match the drapes. Both literally and…literally.
bb- You stole the warts right out of my mouth…
Looks like a gooeyduck clam
It is big i lick to see and to have sex onit.
i Just even, that Dick in my mouth.. hmm slurpy
Hey, My name is Robert, I think you are sexy, and I would love to suck your cock.
Hey, My name is Robert, I think you are sexy, and I would love to suck your cock.
if you can photoshop your cawk that big why couldnt you just photoshop yourself into a tasteful room?
delicious. Maybe you u know that your pic is posted… I keep jerking off to you. email me and make my dream cum true.
marco.tesse@gmail.com
How do I get in contact with him. He is super sexy. Can you please pass on my info to him…
wow, thats a huge cock. just gorgeous, i cant see anything else.. : )
This was obviously a flash picture. There should be a shadow of the cock on the guy’s shirt. There’s none. The cock was selected, copied, pasted on top and scaled up, thereby covering the original-sized cock and its drop-shadow…
The art of photoshopping a cock shot to one’s advantage relies on scaling the whole photograph DOWN a tad (after selecting and copying the cock and its shadow) BEFORE pasting the cock back on. One thus avoids getting jaggies and coarse groin hair…
Oh and by the way, Methinks its Virginia Gloriana Elisabeth I in the box, and not the Infant of Prague!