Steve: The person who submitted this noted the presence of a ‘water cooler’ next to the bed, however I’m not sure we don’t have a full-on robot companion.
Otherwise, c-l-a-s-s-y.
David K. publishes Nightcharm, the only gay porn site ever to be featured on Oprah and regularly compared to Martha Stewart Living.
Shawn Baker is the Executive-Editor of Nightcharm and hails from New York. He is a member of its young underclass, a little bit Ann Darrow, a little bit Travis Bickle.
Richard writes the infamous queer blog Sturtle.com . His turn-ons include wainscoting, ZZ Top, and sharp-dressed men. Turn-offs: sectionals, pleated trousers, and pina coladas.
Heather Corinna is the undisputed diva of online erotica for chicks. She publishes Scarleteen.com and is a sex guru to thousands of teenagers.
Sean Horlor is happy to no longer be using his judgmental prowess for the forces of darkness. He co-hosts a comedy lifestyle reality TV series called Don't Quit Your Gay Job and runs Up Your Alley.
- "A" for Effort
- Bathroom Abominations
- Bedroom Terrors
- Beyond Horrifying
- Calvacade of Calamities
- Closet Catastrophes
- Curb Upheaval
- Dens From Hell
- Dining Room Don'ts
- Floral Attack
- For the hell of it
- Fucked Up Foyers
- Haunted Hallways
- Hot Anyway
- Kitchen Kitsch
- Living Room Wreckage
- Loopy Lighting
- Must Haves
- News
- Something Different
- Suffocating Sofas
- Violations of Space
- July 2010
- June 2010
- May 2010
- April 2010
- March 2010
- February 2010
- January 2010
- December 2009
- November 2009
- October 2009
- September 2009
- August 2009
- July 2009
- June 2009
- May 2009
- April 2009
- March 2009
- February 2009
- January 2009
- December 2008
- November 2008
- October 2008
- September 2008
- August 2008
- Jake Cruise
- MALEFLIX
- Military Classified
- Men at Play
- Sean Cody
- Bi Curious
- Three Pillows
- Boy's First Time
- Nightcharm: Naked Men & Gay Porn Fun
- A Train Wreck
- Dainty Bastard
- G Day
- Gay Sex Magic eCards
- Gayest Ever
- Gideonse Bible
- He Said He Did
- It’s Not You, It’s Me
- Lord Arthur
- Mean Dirty Pirate
- My Cat Threw Up on my Ferragamos
- Put ‘em All on an Island
- Queer Bites
- STARFUCKER
- Wayne’s Nude Musicians
- Yuppie Punk
© 2010 Nightcharm Inc. All rights reserved. No portion of this site may be reproduced without the writen permission of the owner.
“Death Star? It’s Vader. Listen, I’m gonna take personal day.”
Tacky 80s decor, awesome subject!!!!!
Reminds me of
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fK7QZb9As1k
Funky Walker, Dirty Talker!
Definitely tacky 80s. That brass bedstead with the li’l curlicues might have looked good about 25 years ago but not now. You’d think someone who could afford his personal Robot Of Death could afford a halfway up-to-date bed (or something in a classic style). Unless he spent all his money on the Robot Of Death, or the Robot Of Death does the shopping. In which case, he’d better program it to go somewhere other than thrift shops.
Is that a pillow or comforter under his leg there? It’s all wrong with those black sheets…but they’re all wrong anyway. Black sheets hide lots of sins, which is exactly the problem.
The pose is hardly enticing, too. He looks so uninterested and easily distracted. “Oh yeah baby….oh yeah….(pause)…oh hey there sistah, oh, I’m not doing anything…” Suuuure, that’s a turn-on.
Ick Ick Ick
And that goes for the bargain-basement Dalek, too.
def a “theme” going on here……
Okay, I did see that bed in “The Oak” furniture store window back in the 70’s. Ergo, it is officially tacky. Is that real or fake wood panelling on the walls? I must wait for the shudder to pass. Just what is that device? A stereo system? A sexual device I’m not familiar with? Someone help me, I’ve got to know! And, Dawg, if you’re going to subject me to this decor, the least you could do is show the goods.
This kind of ‘midnight opulence’ look for the bedroom is really what I aspire to. Save for the walls and weird comforter thing under his leg I’d stay locked up in that velveteen dungeon for days.
that “thing” on the side of his bed is an electronic water cooler. we have them in my office at work.
and the weird comforter under his leg looks almost like a bed in a bag!
What the hell is he doing with a water cooler in his bedroom?
could be a lube dispenser.
Yeah, ice cold lube is such a turn-on.
Carrying Black Pride into Interior Decoration was just one way John hoped to show that being gay didn’t mean he was now any less of a fighter.
Conversation on the other end of the phone:
“For the LAST time Mr. Johnston, we here at Playgirl regret to inform you that we won’t be using you as a feature model after all. You lied on your application about your uh,….. gifts, and no amount of satin sheet shifting of pillow poofing could divert our readers from your pitiful showing.
We let you keep the bed from the photo shoot for Christ’s Sake! What more do you want?
None-the-less, our crew did want to thank you for showing us that rare and extremely valuable electronic devise you own: The world’s first portable phone! How fascinating!
Do you still keep it b your bed? Black, wasn’t it?
Please don’t call us again. Your dick couldn’t fill the space on a business card, let alone a fold-out.
Goodbye. “
Value City Lay-A-Way Coordinator George understands your difficulty, but cannot locate your purchase at this time.
Obviously a dated photograph. Easy to tell, because under newer federal regulations, satin sheets now require seat belts to prevent rollover and out of bed slippage, and they are lacking here.
The matching satin codpiece, strategically placed, provides modesty for a brutha who is trying to keep it real. Can you dig it?
Is that a photo to the right of his ankle? I hope so ’cause I’m calling it the focal point in this space. I thought the walls were a bad wall paper but the designers are correct, it is paneling. Gaudy? Is that a good word for the bed? I’d say a major make-over is in order. Remove everything from the room. I don’t think anything can be saved, except the man on the bed. I’ll keep him until the redesign is complete.
I find the juxtaposition of the 1980’s “pay by month” bed set clashes particularly with the dingy white wood basement paneling. Couldn’t he have at least hung a sheet? Or swiped some of the red felt from Antlerboy? I can’t tell if the thing in the lower right hand corner is a sort of bolster pillow, a lantern thingy, or what.
Rodin…….priceless commentary!!
All I’m saying is that some of you gals hatin on the headboard and white panel walls might just see them in a different light if your prissy little faces were mashed up against them for about twenty minutes while Johnny Jackhammer here gave you some “deeper” appreciation for his decor. And those satin sheets taste real good when you bite into them in agony and ecstasy. Anyone want to admit I’m on to you? Come on…the truth will set you free. I’m thinking black is the new black. I don’t know what the hell that robot thing is but I bet twenty seconds in and I can block it out of my mind.
So, Buddy X, you are saying that you like the textures of the space.
I think you have a point. Visually, the place is best viewed in total darkness; however, one might find the textures pleasing. Again, however, I wonder how one would even stay fixed upon the bedding while being plowed.
Anyone else care to comment?
Meh.
I’m not feelin’ it.
Nashbear, two words: wrist restraints
Musclebound, do they make them in glow-in-the-dark colors?
Not sure, ask Buddy X. HA!!!!
Is this Smoove B. from The Onion?
Pilled, bargain basement, black, faux-satin sheets and a chrome-plated Belle Epoque headboard – while tacky – are not necessarily incompatible. But when combined with additional bedding in teenage-girl calico and a Darth Vader water cooler stationed within easy reach, we start drifting into CrazyTown. Throw in the unforgivable white paneling and all signs are clear: This man is straight. Irredeemably straight. There’s just no other possible explanation (save psychosis). However, I can’t help but notice that whatever it is he’s using to cover his johnson is a very different shade of black than are the sheets so I’m going to have to assume that it is what it looks like – a Hefty bag. Which can only mean that he’s going to make some blind, thirsty woman VERY happy one day.
Perhaps, what ever he is using to cover up his johnson, is a cum rag……thus it has been washed more than the sheets and has faded. White on black? Make sense to me in more ways than one.
Perhaps, whatever he is using to cover up his johnson, is a cum rag……thus it has been washed more than the sheets and has faded. White on black? Make sense to me, in more ways than one.
Hello Rent-A-Center:
I know I have average credit but that’s no excuse for sending me a water cooler when I requested a refrigerator with water dispenser. Yes, black will be fine.
once you’ve had black….
…you fire your decorator
Oh Michelle, where are you? I seriously hope you aren’t going to let PnB bully you. Speaking of Pork-n-Beans… nice double post. Just keep hitting those buttons girls, technology is so damn confusing.
Pork, “Did it go through?”
Beans, “I don’t know. Hit it again.”
Pork, “OK.”
remember that ST:TNG where the tarpit ate tasha yar? that could be what’s happening to this guy.
That would be “LaVozda”
Thanks for the encouragement, Fabric Swatch!!!! But, I just can’t top the first post, “Death Star, it’s Vadar. I’m taking a personal day off”. I’m still laughing!!!!! My first instinct was to compare his digs to the Death Star–however, I picture the Mel Brooks, Spaceballs version. Our guy looks like he’s on his coffee break/evening shift. I do like a man that goes with a theme—black and white are classics. He threw in a little aqua and mauve just to trick the eyes!! However, I’m back to the Death Star breakroom—-I think that’s a droid at a glory hole in the right corner!! Love the painted paneling.
Michelle
Thanks again F.S. Happy 2009!
Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For the love of god….
“Droid at a glory hole.” I love that! There’s a scene for a gay porn film.
“Droid at a glory hole.” Too funny, Michelle! Keep ‘em coming (so to speak…).
“Take me to your breader…” and away from this little piece of hell.
BTW, the paneling was not this color originally… is now painted
damnit, now i can’t stop singing.
droid at the gloryhole, shoo fly shoo. droid at the gloryhole, shoo fly shoo…
Droid at the gloryhole, shoo fly shoo?
Oh, my.
When did you stumble across my graduating class song?
Slip in the spoo, my darling.
that was your class song? i didn’t know you went to georgia tech.
Oooh!
Snaps!
Nothing is more sexy than sliding around on 100% satin polyester sheets in a black sexploitation film.