File Under:Bedroom Terrors

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26 Responses to 'The Drawback of Plastic Containers (& Scattered Trash)'

1. Drew in Palm Springs remarks:
   Note the bouquet at far left!

   
   

   January 7th, 2012 at 8:58 pm
2. HollerMan remarks:
   Different textures, different patterns, different themes. Yes, this is where all the Filene’s Basement rejects gather together for one last display. From the chic Palms from which the Fairy Princess Canopy outlines the bed borders to the white plastic hamper, trash bin and laundry basket stand out in contrast from the bluish-grayish-beige rest of the room it is easy to see that this youngster stayed up many a late night planning his design. Kudos for the smartly set blue recycling bag at the foot of the Sacrificial Altar of Finesse reflecting the pallid rope rug at the little Lamb’s right ankle. Notice how the eye is automatically drawn to the piece of blue fabric set upon the green rubbermaid storage container thus creating the perfect triangle drawing one further more into the room. There’s just so much “right stuff” here to overcome the few flaws that some more pissy queens will endlessly fuss about. Jealousy is not pretty.

   
   

   January 7th, 2012 at 11:04 pm
3. ericthewriter remarks:
   there’s got to be a Whorders or hoard’oeuvre joke here somewhere, but damn if i feel like straining for it.

   i wish to once again beg all the young budget gays out there, if you must use a dropcloth for a slipcover, spend $5 and take 5 minutes to invest in upholstery screws. they genteel up the furniture and they can be easily removed for laundering, which i suspect this cloth will need after a few more photo opportunities.

   PS. i had an $8 sidetable like that in my ’80s apartment. i painted the legs copper and did faux malachite on the tabletop. sold it for $35 a week later.

   
   

   January 8th, 2012 at 9:17 am
4. folkyboy remarks:
   I’m curious to find out what serial killer had this poor boy pose in such a mess. It’s almost as if he’s scared to touch the fabric touching that couch or some such?

   Maybe all those containers are because that’s what the serial killer used to cut up our model after it was all said and done?

   
   

   January 8th, 2012 at 9:47 am
5. ericthewriter remarks:
   i don’t read this as serial-killer mess. looks to me like had-to-move-out-of-one-dump-in-the-middle-of-the-night-and-into-another-one mess.

   
   

   January 8th, 2012 at 10:04 am
6. RedBackFur remarks:
   I want to know where to purchase the Invisible Ceiling Fan with light from where hence those pull bead-chains are attached to.

   
   

   January 8th, 2012 at 12:31 pm
7. Chris remarks:
   There’s a lovely meld of modern post modern and antique going on here that takes real skill to spot. The mirror and dresser are undoubtedly old and likely scavenged from great aunt Hilda’s guest bedroom after she passed. The Eames style copycat table from Target seems an odd choice to put in the middle of the room, but helps to balance out all of the Rubbermaid kitsch. The rather bland vertical blinds do a nice job of keeping private things private, but I’m most confused by the object in the upper left corner. Is it a plant? A plastic plant potentially? And why oh why is it mere inches from the ceiling?

   
   

   January 8th, 2012 at 1:54 pm
8. RedBackFur remarks:
   That upper left hanging object, to me, would better suited be a Shell No-Pest Strip® – Decora edition.

   
   

   January 9th, 2012 at 8:14 am
9. gobigold remarks:
   In addition to the mysterious “no pest strip”, I’m intrigued by the white ball topped with what appears to be some sort of mutant triangular-shaped red fez, complete with tassle.

   
   

   January 9th, 2012 at 11:11 am
10. Mick remarks:
    A visual cautionary tale if ever there was one: this is what happens when you spend good money converting that unsightly hole of a daylight basement into an extra bedroom. And what is it that happens? In the current economy, what happens is that your twenty-something child who’s just finished his PhD in comparative literature returns to the nest and, despairing of finding more wholesome activities, passes the time by transforming the spare bedroom back into an unsightly hole.

    
    

    January 9th, 2012 at 4:12 pm
11. bobbyt remarks:
    The makeshift Palms Springs operating theatre, complete with customary sterilized beige surgical sheeting, where a displaced Panamanian doctor is undertaking his recent, intriguingly-titled project: “Human Centipede: Enter The Abyss”

    
    

    January 9th, 2012 at 8:42 pm
12. Taffty Donut remarks:
    Given the condition of the rumpus room, if what is about to transpire warrants dressing the large mass (or tumor) in the middle of the room with a beige drop-cloth, my query is: why bother?

    Lower left corner floor appears to be one of those space saving vacuum bags. This entire room deserves to be encased in plastic and void of oxygen until it’s very existence ceases to be.

    
    

    January 9th, 2012 at 10:05 pm
13. ericthewriter remarks:
    Lurid Digs put its disease into me.

    I don’t know why else i keep being drawn back to comment on this particular room.

    So let me get the snark out of the way:
    Worst ‘The Barretts of Wimpole Street’ revival ever.

    And now, a sermonette on clothing clutter. the average american male wears 20% of his clothing 80% of the time. so it follows that this young man could easily get rid of at least 50% of what’s left. then the totes and hampers and spacebags would be gone, and some under-ensembled youth could have dozens of Mossimo outfits to call his own.

    some wags might say that this particular backside (and its accompanying frontside) should divest itself of 100% of its clothing 100% of the time, but that is a discussion for another forum.

    then the dusting and the vacuuming and the winnowing and decrapping could begin.

    i feel that in his secret heart of hearts, our young’un here wants to have his very own Milady’s Boudoir.

    this ain’t it.

    i was recently forced at gunpoint (okay, actually at threat-of-losing-priveleges-of-visiting-his cockpoint) to spend two hours of my life i will never get back and for which no amount of frenzied copulation will ever make up slogging through Hobby Lobby.
    there i discovered that there are now removable decalomania which simulate all manner of borders, stencilled efects and wallpaper panels.
    on sale, no less.
    they might be an accessible starting point for this Versaille-on-the-Turnpike.

    i’d paint that dressing table white and use it as a console. i’d hotglue the shell collection you know is in one of those totes to the mirror. voila! instant DIY rococco!

    and speaking of DIY, i want to tell our budding foofqueen that Simplicity Home has a pattern kit for making a glamorous slipper chair from its utilitarian folding cousin.

    think toile. think brocade. think ticking stripes in pastel tones. think reproduction ivory lace.
    and while he’s thinking about it, he should make a cloth for that
    sidetable. then if he MUST keep a hamper in the room, at least it will have a cozy place to hide.

    
    

    January 10th, 2012 at 5:37 am
14. Peaches remarks:
    I do like how the swag has created the illusion of a bordello-esque headboard. Poorly executed, but a nice idea nonetheless. How this guys feet aren’t blackened by the filthy floor is an achievement in itself.

    
    

    January 10th, 2012 at 12:47 pm
15. Eric remarks:
    HEY! Watch yourselves! The black drape obviously indicates this boy is in mourning. I think it’s more than a little insensitive to nitpick about the trash on the carpet, etc. He’s kneeling at the foot of his bed for heaven’s sake! Obviously praying to our Lord & Saviour Jesus Christ for a warm reception in Heaven for his lost loved one. People can be so cruel. Tsk, tsk.

    
    

    January 10th, 2012 at 8:42 pm
16. Eric remarks:
    @Ericthewriter (I’m pretty sure I love you for who you are and not just because we have the same name, but not 100% sure.)

    RE your post: “Lurid Digs put its disease into me…” As an imaginary University Professor, I will be putting together a degree plan at SF State for students wishing to understand this fantastic, arcane, post in all its dimensions.

    BA’s, MA’s, can hope for charitable employers with quirky family businesses to hire them to make a living. But PhD’s will be absolutely unemployable, and likely certifiable…

    Until “Foofqueens” become a major target market for corporations and headhunters are netting $40k commissions for delivering them to hungry clients.

    
    

    January 10th, 2012 at 8:53 pm
17. Eric remarks:
    ETW, in all seriousness, you have SO written a masterpiece! “Decalomania”, enough said! I could go on, and often do. Every time I want to delete this bookmark I come back and you have given the world a jewel of the written word.

    
    

    January 10th, 2012 at 9:02 pm
18. ericthewriter remarks:
    @eric:

    luv ya bunches but i worry you have too much free time.

    as do i, of course.

    
    

    January 11th, 2012 at 5:19 am
19. anonymous remarks:
    I say if you’ve got the time to develop calves like that, then you definitely have time to take the garbage out to the dumpster and then walk the dirty laundry to the laundromat. [As a matter of fact, I give him an A+ just because there is no filthy footwear added in as a fifth or sixth layer of garbage.] And if this guy bothered with the tan sheet over the end of the bed and bench (is it a duvet cover or the world’s largest cumrag?), then I shudder to contemplate just how much shit is heaped underneath the boxspring, that even he would be ashamed of his mess.

    p.s. I swear to God there’s a beautiful mahogany wardrobe or armoire hiding just at the edge of this rubbermaid/sterilite catastrophe.

    
    

    January 11th, 2012 at 11:16 pm
20. Dash remarks:
    2 things: One: OK. Before you take a picture, regardless of what yer pointing at us, at least VACUMN for Christ’s Sake !!! Two: Peach was never my favorite color.

    
    

    January 12th, 2012 at 12:29 pm
21. Eric remarks:
    @ETW that’s sweet of you to say, but I live in a very expensive city, and work for major software powerhouse. I have very little free time. I’m the only gainfully employed person in my household. But after a day of fire drills your writing is something I very look forward to. RELAX! It doesn’t mean we need to get married, have sex, or any of that… but I would definitely like to “friend” your brain. And encourage you to push your talent. xoxo/e

    
    

    January 12th, 2012 at 9:58 pm
22. ericthewriter remarks:
    damn, and in my mind you made handpainted chinoiserie wallpaper and lived in a paisley-soaked attic bedsit jsut down the block from the sexclubs on folsom.

    *sigh*

    can we still have sex?

    
    

    January 13th, 2012 at 6:56 am
23. Tony the Busdriver remarks:
    While the 2 Erics are having their love fest (I feel soooo left out) I’m compiling my list.
    1/ Clean the place…
    2/ Lose the vertical blinds.
    3/ Store stuff in the storage room
    4/ Am I detecting a love seat placed in front of a bed???
    5/ I do like his use of PINK accents on the beige throw. A little more contrast would be nice… hit the tanning bed hunny

    
    

    January 14th, 2012 at 10:37 am
24. ericthewriter remarks:
    instead of the tanning bed, i recommend he paint the walls in a nice light suntan tone. one called Indian Peach comes to mind. it’s a less expensive and healthier option than melanoma.

    
    

    January 14th, 2012 at 12:11 pm
25. Frank remarks:
    The Santa Claus cap – visible just to the left of the model’s left shoulder – is a nice touch.

    
    

    January 21st, 2012 at 6:15 am
26. Lucky Irish remarks:
    I adore someone not afraid to let their ‘Tweeker Chic’ fashion sensibilities shine. I do think this young man w/the hungry bum missed out on a real opportunity to feature their latest ‘Frankenstien Electronics’ sculpture installation. You know the kind where in a frenzy of ‘creativity’ something that may, or may not be broadcasting messages from the Police or Aliens is disassembled, then, ala Rauschenberg, reassembled without using all the parts from the first go. Very experimental. Very Hello-Betty Ford Clinic? meets Fluxus movement.

    
    

    February 14th, 2012 at 7:26 pm

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